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This past weekend we once again packed the kids into the car, filling both the back of the SUV and the roof-top carrier to capacity, and headed to one of my families’ house in Tennessee. This three hour trip was a much more doable trip than the nine-hour mega-drive we did earlier this year, but still, it was no picnic.
To make it even more fun, after I drove the dogs over to the in-laws house where they were staying while we were away, and as I was trying to get them situated, our 85-lb Weimaraner decided to set up shop on the futon despite my repeated admonitions to “Get down” and “Come here!” which really only served to scare her causing her to hunker futher down on the futon rather than doing what I wanted her to do. In a fit of testosterone-laden anger, I grabbed her by the collar and yanked her off the futon and in doing so, pulled my back out! Crap!

As you may know, I’ve had two back surgeries and I have so little cushy disc left between four of my vertebrae that if anything major ever happens again, I’ll need to either have them replaced, or have my spine fused. The only way I get through a day of sitting in an office chair is through prescription medication (just one thank you very much) and sometimes it takes something as asinine as pulling a dog off a futon to turn me into a leg-dragging zombie look-alike from “Dawn of the Dead.” The really fun part is that right when I pull it, I only know that I did “something,” but I’m never sure how bad it is till that evening or the next day.

So anyway, I came home, made sure my drugs were packed and hit the road. The next day (Saturday) I was in an excruciating amount of pain, but managed to make it through the Ripley’s Believe it or Not Aquarium in Gatlinburg, TN. Later, I languished on the couch and watched football, which wouldn’t have been bad if my mom and her husband had not insisted on carrying on a conversation rather than allowing me to actually watch the game.

But, we’re home now and I just took my last pain pill. I thought I was doing better till the baby woke up last night and as I was just bending over to pick him up out of his crib, I felt my back separate again and I almost busted my chin on the edge of the crib as my knees buckled. I luckily caught myself and managed to get him changed and back down. But tonight, I have a Labor Day get together and I’m praying there are plenty of places to sit down because I probably won’t be too sociable while grimacing in pain. I’d hate for people to think I’m making strange faces in response to, “So, what do you think about this new picture we purchased for the dining room?”
My wife would never forgive me if I got us taken off the “A-list” of social invitees. Actually, we’re probably more like the “C-List” if there were such a thing…for family gatherings…


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