Well, we’re movin’ on up….(movin’ on up)

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At work today, a lady with whom I used to work sent several pointed e-mail messages to me about a meeting that I had been invited to by my boss. Being an “invitation” from my boss, I accepted. Apparently, this former co-worker didn’t like my being there and as I mentioned, sent me three separate e-mail making it, and I quote, “crystal clear,”  that the meeting was for Sr. Mgt. only and that basically I wasn’t invited.


I’m a pretty bright guy usually, and I got her intent on the first message, so by the third one, I was tired of playing and asked her if there was something personal going on that I should know about. Her reply, “It’s never personal, only business.”


This got me thinking about something. In my own personal experience, there are two type of professional women. There’s A) the seasoned professional who has raised kids and while she may be tough, she is also in touch with her softer side. Then there’s B) the youngish (under 40) woman who has never been married, doesn’t have kids and who, for whatever reason decided that the only way to survive in the business world is by putting her emotions on the back burner.


Thinking back on all of the women I’ve worked for/with, and whom I didn’t particularly care for, I discovered that almost without fail, each of them can be classified in this B) category. They have all been hard women, with little to no empathy for the people they come into contact with. And it’s not just me either, CareerMom has said on more than one occasion that she would rather work for a man than a woman and to a person, each of the female managers she’s had, has also fit this category B) description.


I don’t know why some women feel that this is necessary. Certainly there are men who act the same way, but I think that on average, there is an unwritten rule between men that says, “Hey, I get that you’re territorial and I’m not trying to get into your business. I also know that you have a family to support and I don’t want to jeopardize that. So, let’s figure out how we can work together to get this done howabout?” 


So for the person who says, “It’s never personal…” I don’t dislike you; I pity you—in a “I dislike you and pity you at the same time” kind of way. While you may very well move up the corporate ladder, I think you’re going to find yourself very lonely at the top. There’s more to life than money; just ask all the stay at home dads.


4 thoughts on “Well, we’re movin’ on up….(movin’ on up)

    Bikini said:
    January 31, 2008 at 9:11 am

    Dude. Where are these happy interns?

    And yes, I think I’d rather work for a man than a woman. Women are crazy.

    Allison said:
    January 31, 2008 at 9:41 am

    It’s not personal, it’s business? Didn’t Richard Gere say something like that in Pretty Woman to justify tearing companies apart? It was a pretty lame line then, and still is.

    I’m going to have to agree with you and CareerMom on this issue. I would prefer to work for a man any day over working for a woman. My prior boss was a female who micromanaged to the nth degree (read: control freak). She admonished employees who took an occasional day off for a sick child, encouraging them to send their sick kids to distant relatives if necessary (I did not experience this personally, as I took a vow to wait to have a child until after I left her regime). Incidentally, she had 2 children. She sang “Ding-Dong, the Kid is gone” everytime her oldest returned to college in the fall. Very telling.

    Anyway, I currently have 5 male bosses and I am much happier. They care about the finished product, but don’t feel the need to stand over shoulders dictating every move. Time and time again, they say “family first” and they mean it. Who would have thought that 5 CPA’s would be more compassionate and socially intelligent than a female social work supervisor?

    Three emails? Good grief, B woman. Have fun at the top (by yourself.)

    dobeman said:
    January 31, 2008 at 10:05 am

    Glad you agree. I figured this post would either get me flamed by women everwhere, or would get a lot of support from family-oriented worker-bees. The way gendor roles are changing is terribly interesting to me and I’m always fascinated when I see one gender take the other gender’s traditional role to the extreme. Me, I’m trying to find a balance. The old, “Do everything in moderation” saying gets more and more appealing to me as I get older.

    Dana said:
    January 31, 2008 at 7:54 pm

    I am in agreement here. I do not ever want to work for a woman. I’ve done that, but thankfully not for long. I’ve worked for the same man for 7 years and I could not ask for anyone better. He’s more understanding than any woman I could ever hope to work for. I tend to find that the men just tell you want they want done and expect you to make it happen. They don’t peer over your shoulder or continuously follow up. I tell my boss frequently that I don’t want to work for anyone else in our company. He and I have a deal that if he ever leaves we are a package deal!

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